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 -Africanomami89
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i am .ME.
Friday, March 13, 2009 @ 4:03 AM
Currently: .Lost. Now Playing: Beyonce- Disappear
Dear Diary,
Well its 4:05 am in the morning and I'm still up as always. After a few hours trying to figure out how blogger works...i finally got *new* music playlist up. Each song has a meaning to me....all in their own different ways. so if you gotta question on a song..dont be shy..hit me up on the *new* tagboard. ((see above)) more stuff coming soon.
Anyways...i had a sudden urge to jump the band wagon and listen to the whole Beyonce "I am Sasha Fierce", and i gotta say....the album is NICE. maybe not as effective to me as Robin Thicke "Something else" album or Jesse Mccartney "Departure" album (lol) but its still good. but her tracks "Broken hearted Girl" "Scared of Lonely" excluding "Diva" or "Single Ladies" or "Video Phone" ((those songs are hott)) but the 1st too describe my mindset at this moment of time.
"I dont want a broken heart...and i dont want to play the broken hearted girl.No No... No broken hearted girl." -Beyonce (Broken hearted girl)
^-- How do i relate to this song? Well......I had been in a serious relationship for a lil more than 2 years but hasnt been truly "alone" for the part 3 years. So basically i had someone always there even when i was at the bottom of bottoms. Having the best of both worlds...i got to live my life, laugh and play during the day..then cuddle or sweet talk on the phone/in person at night.
Recently....me and my last boyfriend broke up because of long distance. It was mutual yet still felt like i was loosing a part of myself. The guy who knew me more than my parents knew me....The guy who stuck it in with me even when i was being an asshole or vice versa. The guy who waited for me. And at this point now that i am alone i feel lost in a way because no matter what i do...i feel like i always need someone there to make me happy.
   So how is single life really? It sucks...because im not used to it. I listen to more music than ever because i think about my dreams..my fantasies...but mostly my memories. But is ok...because i will be ok. Thanks to those people who are/were around me...i realize that i do need to be more independent. Even if my feeling want something SOO bad.... i have to do what is better for me. and that is to be My own bestfriend. and if that means i need to disconnect..then thats what it means. =( to me because i believe in God and what he can do for me.... If he want it to happen...It will happen.
"Should i wait for you to call? Is there any hope at all? Or are you drifting by? The more i was think about it...the less i was able to share with you. I try to reach for you..your nearly
here..but then you disappear." -Beyonce (Disappear)
^-- This song makes me sad because it reminds me of my past and my present. Its like taking candy from a baby...when you have something soo sweet it just got taken away..you get upset. I try to not think of everything throughout the day..and i thank GOD im in school. another reason why i DONT want to go home. At home there is nothing but 4 corners and a laptop and my thoughts. atleast in school if i want to get away i can. But my point is....I feel lost because i try to do things to make things better but it always backfires at me. No matter how hard i try or how little i try...it still bites me in my butt. Ugh.
I know atleast that im thankful for all those who have been in my life and for those who will continue to be in my life. The great thing about me...i keep it real. Life is about tasting different flavors...some sour..some sweet... overall you had a taste of it.
What myself and others who are out there have to remeber is...
"Never predict the future because you are making your own assumptions and working hard to not let it happen..Let it rock...you have no idea what will happen tomarrow...So live it like its your last...you never know..you acutally might have something good going for you." -Me.
 Think about it.Analyze it. Understand it. Any questions...ask me. Then you will know what im talking about.
As for me..... im Lost...yet not Found..but thats ok because even if it hurts i will be my own bestfriend....atleast till the time is right. ♥ ♥
I AM ME.
© Miss Nyyy.
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i am .ME.
Friday, March 13, 2009, 4:03 AM
Currently: .Lost. Now Playing: Beyonce- Disappear
Dear Diary,
Well its 4:05 am in the morning and I'm still up as always. After a few hours trying to figure out how blogger works...i finally got *new* music playlist up. Each song has a meaning to me....all in their own different ways. so if you gotta question on a song..dont be shy..hit me up on the *new* tagboard. ((see above)) more stuff coming soon.
Anyways...i had a sudden urge to jump the band wagon and listen to the whole Beyonce "I am Sasha Fierce", and i gotta say....the album is NICE. maybe not as effective to me as Robin Thicke "Something else" album or Jesse Mccartney "Departure" album (lol) but its still good. but her tracks "Broken hearted Girl" "Scared of Lonely" excluding "Diva" or "Single Ladies" or "Video Phone" ((those songs are hott)) but the 1st too describe my mindset at this moment of time.
"I dont want a broken heart...and i dont want to play the broken hearted girl.No No... No broken hearted girl." -Beyonce (Broken hearted girl)
^-- How do i relate to this song? Well......I had been in a serious relationship for a lil more than 2 years but hasnt been truly "alone" for the part 3 years. So basically i had someone always there even when i was at the bottom of bottoms. Having the best of both worlds...i got to live my life, laugh and play during the day..then cuddle or sweet talk on the phone/in person at night.
Recently....me and my last boyfriend broke up because of long distance. It was mutual yet still felt like i was loosing a part of myself. The guy who knew me more than my parents knew me....The guy who stuck it in with me even when i was being an asshole or vice versa. The guy who waited for me. And at this point now that i am alone i feel lost in a way because no matter what i do...i feel like i always need someone there to make me happy.
So how is single life really? It sucks...because im not used to it. I listen to more music than ever because i think about my dreams..my fantasies...but mostly my memories. But is ok...because i will be ok. Thanks to those people who are/were around me...i realize that i do need to be more independent. Even if my feeling want something SOO bad.... i have to do what is better for me. and that is to be My own bestfriend. and if that means i need to disconnect..then thats what it means. =( to me because i believe in God and what he can do for me.... If he want it to happen...It will happen.
"Should i wait for you to call? Is there any hope at all? Or are you drifting by? The more i was think about it...the less i was able to share with you. I try to reach for you..your nearly
here..but then you disappear." -Beyonce (Disappear)
^-- This song makes me sad because it reminds me of my past and my present. Its like taking candy from a baby...when you have something soo sweet it just got taken away..you get upset. I try to not think of everything throughout the day..and i thank GOD im in school. another reason why i DONT want to go home. At home there is nothing but 4 corners and a laptop and my thoughts. atleast in school if i want to get away i can. But my point is....I feel lost because i try to do things to make things better but it always backfires at me. No matter how hard i try or how little i try...it still bites me in my butt. Ugh.
I know atleast that im thankful for all those who have been in my life and for those who will continue to be in my life. The great thing about me...i keep it real. Life is about tasting different flavors...some sour..some sweet... overall you had a taste of it.
What myself and others who are out there have to remeber is...
"Never predict the future because you are making your own assumptions and working hard to not let it happen..Let it rock...you have no idea what will happen tomarrow...So live it like its your last...you never know..you acutally might have something good going for you." -Me.
Think about it.Analyze it. Understand it. Any questions...ask me. Then you will know what im talking about.
As for me..... im Lost...yet not Found..but thats ok because even if it hurts i will be my own bestfriend....atleast till the time is right. ♥ ♥
I AM ME.
© Miss Nyyy.
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.Aboutme.
-About me-
[x] Name- Miss Ny (N-i)
[x] Location- NY, USA
[x] Age- 19 years old
[x] Level- Sophmore in College
[x] Sign- Gemini (May 89' baby) =)
[x] Motto- "Be Original Be you
[x] Best Feature- Smileeee.
-Likes-
[~] Computers
[~] Graphics
[~] Movies. Classic Horror!
[~] Cookies n Cream ice cream
[~] Snakes
[~] Rock Band
[~] Animals
[~] and CHEESECAKE!
-Loves-
[+] MUSIC!
[+] Dancing (having fun)
[+] Harry Potter
[+] Marvel & DC comics
[+] White chocolate <3
[+] Dogs + Cats!
[+] Twitter & Facebook
[+] Shia Laboeuf,Matt Dallas, Robin Thicke
[+] Cute Smile ♥
-Hates-
[-] Players
[-] Drugs
[-] Flith
[-] Disrespect
[-] Animal killers.
[-] Failure
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Aim-Africanomami89
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